Friday, 27 November 2015

Toddler Life #2

KP - Bonjour, cheeky monkey

Welcome to the second post in my Toddler Life series.  If you follow me on Twitter, you'll be familiar with my #toddlerlife tweets, featuring my three year old nephew, Kaine (KP). Carry on reading for the funny things he says...

KP - My having a party with pork pies, cake, chocolate, ham butties and beer.

Kaine on the toilet holding my hands for balance and singing, 'Row, Row, Row the Boat'.

KP - Look, binge bob.
Me - What?
* He meant Spongebob

KP - Only Danty Sarah calls me KP
* Yes, little buddy

The toilet is 'tow-lit'

Chocolate dessert all over his face
Mum (his Nan) - Bloody hell, Kaine, be careful
Me - He's only two
KP - Bloody hell, my only two

Me - Is Luke your friend?
KP - Yep.
Me - Is Meadow your friend?
KP - No, she can't talk.

Me - Shall we go and get your milk?
KP - No, you get it, my stay here.
* He's not stupid

Arguing with me that his Nanny isn't my Mum.

Me - Do you need a wee?
KP - Nah, none come out.

KP - No, Sarah.
Me - Yes, KP
KP - Go way, Jose
Me - It's 'no way Jose'
KP - Me not, go way, Jose.

He turns songs off if I sing them.

Me - Are you picking your bum?
KP - Yep.

KP - My going Trunk or Treating.

Me - Wow, Kainey, you're very scary
KP - My know, my a bonfire
Me - Oh, I thought you were a vampire.

Let me know any funny things you've heard kids say and whether you like my Toddler Life series.


  1. How am I only just getting around to reading this. I cannot stop laughing at Bloody hell, my only 2. Seriously made a shitty day so much better

    Beth x

    Mermaid in Disguise


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